One of my more famous "blurts" at work was when I told a client that "my job is like internet dating."
Awkward silence.
I realized what I'd said and explained: I work from home. I never meet any of the people I work with -- either clients or co-workers. When I do we usually exchange head-shot photos, a description on what we'll be wearing or at least arrange to meet at a public place like the Starbucks in Terminal A. We're nervous and vaguely excited to see what the real person is like after emailing or talking for a few months. (Of course there are a few key difference between dating and work relationships: the end game, in particular.)
Today I am thinking that house-hunting on Zillow is like internet dating. Consider the facts:
- I am searching Zillow for a particular price range (internet dating: age range)
- I am looking at pictures of the house (internet dating: pictures of the person) meant to show the best possible lighting, angles, magazine-gloss available given the subject
- There is a blurb telling me all the positive facets of the house/person and subtly leaving out the negative features
- When I get to actually see the house (internet dating: meet the person) it's not quite the image I had build up in my mind based on our brief, written relationship. Sometimes this is good, other times not so much.
- 90% of the time, even though I see the possibilities (I was doing some screening, after all), it sounds like too much work and really what I'm looking for (thank goodness I am not in the dating game anymore).
The other thing that struck me about the job search was how good/natural our real estate agent was at checking up on the relationship. After each house hunting session he asks, "How are you feeling? What are you thinking? What did you like/not like?" And then he adds some positive reinforcement like "we'll just keep looking, the right one is out there. We've got plenty of time."
Our most recent house-hunting expedition produced some enticing opportunities. One where we were really interested and basically there was no way to get it down to our price range (or get our downpayment high enough to approach the bank for a loan). REJECTION! (You're still following the dating theme, right?) Another one was really cool, but the guest bathroom on the main level had floor-to-ceiling mirrors on all 4 walls. This would be uncomfortable (I think) for my guests -- at least it would offer me way more information that I truly needed while taking care of business. Other than that the house looked great for entertaining. (Or maybe it depends on the type of entertaining you're doing. I recently read an article in Redbook on swingers clubs which pushed a few of my boundaries...but that's a different post, I am sure.)
At any rate, we're still out there kissing frogs (looking at houses) with the help of our fairy godmother (don't tell the real estate guy that I called him that, please, I am not sure he'd appreciate it).
Signed,
The Princess
PS - Contemplating a biography with a working title "Life is Like Internet Dating..."
Tuesday, March 6, 2012
Sunday, February 26, 2012
House Hunting for The Princess
So you'd think that The Princess (me) would like a big mansion with all the upgrades and tons of space.
Frankly, I am scared of big open spaces in the house. What the heck do you do with them? Cartwheel across your living room until you reach the kitchen? I was never that great a gymnastics... I envision the Bruce Wayne manor, with that long table where Bruce (Keaton) is at one end and Vicki Vale (Basinger) is at the other end and there are like 30 chairs between them, and rooms you never go in. Decadent, but vaguely creepy. Once you do have to go in one of those forgotten rooms for something it (either the room or the item, or both) would probably be infested with spiders.
Yesterday we looked at a few more houses. We focused on the east/central side of town.
One house we saw was a undervalued because it was a repossession where the people leaving had taken all the appliances, all the cabinet knobs, and it had no less than 5 paint colors on walls visible from the front entryway. It would be a nice one to fix up. It was 3 blocks from "casual fast" food like Chipotle, a coffee shop and a grocery store. So it had the walking distance thing going for it. The down side (for me) was that the space would all be used up once we were moved in - with only 3 bedrooms we'd have a master bedroom and each of us would get an office (except the dog, but I asked and he was ok with that). There was a small basement and we could finish it, but I think a bedroom would leave the rest of it feeling small. My office would be kick-ass, though, because the rooms were so big.
We looked at another one really close to our coveted Cherry Creek area. Not really walking distance to anything, and it didn't have a real space for 2 offices and had no garage (I hate scraping my windows in the morning -- and I don't even drive to work. See? I am The Princess).
The strangest house we saw had not one, but TWO, workshop areas. There would be a lot of pressure to start learning woodworking, something involving a blow torch and a welding mask, or at least a fancy historical car needing refinishing. But there were lots of places to hang those pictures of curvy chix on motorcycles on the wall. It also had a Mother-in-Law apartment next to one of the workshops. That had a bathtub with a 2-foot ceiling - which would be perfect for washing the dog if your MIL would let you in her apartment.
We saw another one that was move-in ready -- only needed window coverings. That one had a few remodels done to help update it, was open (which seems to be a side effect of tri-levels), had nice neutral tan paint, hardwood floors, updated kitchen, more closets than we currently have. But a dinky master bath with the sinks in the same room as the bed (no real divider). Priced appropriately. In the middle of random suburbia. But minutes from I-25...
So you'd think with as picky as I am, I should get a house in the "being-built" stage so that I could choose the floor plan and the fixtures. EEEEK! That is way too intimidating too. It's way easier to see what didn't work on something that is already done... I would probably pick out Cowboy paint colors, Southwest tile, Ultra-Modern cabinets and antique Asian cabinet handles all for the kitchen. And I would love each item individually so much that I would believe it would "just work" once it was all together so I wouldn't listen to the advice of the expert. Then I would walk into the finished kitchen and exclaim, "What mess of historical eras and cultures threw up to create this kitchen?!?!"
On the up side, I am probably perfect material for one of those DIY-Network shows where they try to help you find the perfect house. And everyone would have great sympathy for my poor Iggy.
Frankly, I am scared of big open spaces in the house. What the heck do you do with them? Cartwheel across your living room until you reach the kitchen? I was never that great a gymnastics... I envision the Bruce Wayne manor, with that long table where Bruce (Keaton) is at one end and Vicki Vale (Basinger) is at the other end and there are like 30 chairs between them, and rooms you never go in. Decadent, but vaguely creepy. Once you do have to go in one of those forgotten rooms for something it (either the room or the item, or both) would probably be infested with spiders.
Yesterday we looked at a few more houses. We focused on the east/central side of town.
One house we saw was a undervalued because it was a repossession where the people leaving had taken all the appliances, all the cabinet knobs, and it had no less than 5 paint colors on walls visible from the front entryway. It would be a nice one to fix up. It was 3 blocks from "casual fast" food like Chipotle, a coffee shop and a grocery store. So it had the walking distance thing going for it. The down side (for me) was that the space would all be used up once we were moved in - with only 3 bedrooms we'd have a master bedroom and each of us would get an office (except the dog, but I asked and he was ok with that). There was a small basement and we could finish it, but I think a bedroom would leave the rest of it feeling small. My office would be kick-ass, though, because the rooms were so big.
We looked at another one really close to our coveted Cherry Creek area. Not really walking distance to anything, and it didn't have a real space for 2 offices and had no garage (I hate scraping my windows in the morning -- and I don't even drive to work. See? I am The Princess).
The strangest house we saw had not one, but TWO, workshop areas. There would be a lot of pressure to start learning woodworking, something involving a blow torch and a welding mask, or at least a fancy historical car needing refinishing. But there were lots of places to hang those pictures of curvy chix on motorcycles on the wall. It also had a Mother-in-Law apartment next to one of the workshops. That had a bathtub with a 2-foot ceiling - which would be perfect for washing the dog if your MIL would let you in her apartment.
We saw another one that was move-in ready -- only needed window coverings. That one had a few remodels done to help update it, was open (which seems to be a side effect of tri-levels), had nice neutral tan paint, hardwood floors, updated kitchen, more closets than we currently have. But a dinky master bath with the sinks in the same room as the bed (no real divider). Priced appropriately. In the middle of random suburbia. But minutes from I-25...
So you'd think with as picky as I am, I should get a house in the "being-built" stage so that I could choose the floor plan and the fixtures. EEEEK! That is way too intimidating too. It's way easier to see what didn't work on something that is already done... I would probably pick out Cowboy paint colors, Southwest tile, Ultra-Modern cabinets and antique Asian cabinet handles all for the kitchen. And I would love each item individually so much that I would believe it would "just work" once it was all together so I wouldn't listen to the advice of the expert. Then I would walk into the finished kitchen and exclaim, "What mess of historical eras and cultures threw up to create this kitchen?!?!"
On the up side, I am probably perfect material for one of those DIY-Network shows where they try to help you find the perfect house. And everyone would have great sympathy for my poor Iggy.
Saturday, February 18, 2012
American Dream
We started looking for a new place last weekend.
Ever since I decided to sell my condo and live in sin by moving in with Iggy, I have wanted to sell his place. Maybe not the nicest start to things (hey, I love you, but we have to sell this dump and move). But it was a little bit of the traditional American love story, the American Dream (if you will) to buy a house *together*...
I was sorta reticent to broach the subject, so I've been slowly fixing up the current place. Sorta to make it part "mine" and part in preparation for showing it. I worry sometimes that we might make it too nice and we'll never get to get a new place together.
Somehow the new house bug hit Iggy hard about 2 weeks ago. He started searching Zillow.com and showing me houses on his iPAD during the evenings. Last weekend he came up with a plan to drive buy 6 or 8 of them and canvas the neighborhoods so we could get a feel for how much our money would get us. It was fun, but strangely exhausting. We covered several distinct areas of Denver and the suburbs (Capitol Hill, Cherry Creek, Lowry, Upper Lo-Do, and a couple I don't know the names of). I had to take a nap when we got home.
This weekend Iggy's real estate buddy drove us around to look at the insides of a few of the homes. Surprisingly some of the houses we looked at last weekend had already sold! I thought this was a tough seller's market. But maybe the economy is picking up after all...
At any rate, the inside of the first one (Lowry) was lovely, peaceful, contemporary...and maybe a little too "suburbia" for me. It felt a lot like every other house on the block This isn't bad. It's just part of the atmosphere.
The second house had strange levels (1 step up into the dining room, 1 step down into the kitchen, 1 step up into the family room, etc) and tile on the entire main level. It backed up to an apartment complex where people seemed to be working on their cars and milling about in the parking lot. And it smelled funny to me. We didn't even look at the upstairs or the basement.
The third house was built in 1899 and within blocks of downtown - walking distance to a couple restaurants we've tried and liked, a cool indie grocery/market/butcher shop, Daz Bog, etc. I could already feel my shift to hipster-wannabe starting. It wasn't much more room than we have now and the yard was mostly deck with a token amount of lawn/grass. The master bedroom had a lofted reading nook accessible only via a ladder. Can't decide if that's cool or I'd only use it under duress. It had an older kitchen, but some updates around the house. The current owners were clearly fans of IKEA based on the furnishings and the $3500 gift card offered at closing. The garage would take a 12-point turn for me to get my Subaru Outback station wagon into. (Definitely getting a smaller, hipper car if we move to this one.) The biggest worry was the staircase to the upstairs. Not sure Radar could make it...it's open and twisty (and cool) and wooden (read: slick for dogs whose back legs aren't so good anymore). Guess I'm not ready to be a hipster quite yet. (sigh)
The 4th house was just north of City Park and close to the city golf course. This means it's close to the zoo and the history museum. I pictured myself with a museum membership and walking over on afternoons to browse thorough the latest Paleontology or Egyptology exhibit. Very chic. Very intellectual. (And even healthy since I'm walking.) But it wasn't within walking distance of the museum. And the neighborhood felt like a ghost town, sterile, and vaguely creepy for being so well-kept and respectable on the outside but having no people present or outside on a Saturday afternoon. It was a pop-top but the added 2nd floor was done in the cheapest, most artificial way (loved the bathroom, but the vent looked like someone punched a hole in the wall and covered it with a grate to camouflage it). There was a strange closet in the kitchen where the microwave was housed. Like a mini-pantry, I guess. The downstairs ceiling was low enough that our 6'3" realtor's head touched the top at points. So much for my snooty intellectual dream.
The last house was in Cherry Creek. It turns out it was within walking distance of 3 coffee shops, a deli, and within 7 blocks you start hitting restaurants regularly listed in 5280 magazine. 7 blocks to the Cherry Creek Mall (and movie theater). The house was maybe 5% bigger than our current one (I was hoping for more space and better closets). But! It had several kick-ass features: a fire pit outside on the patio, a walk-in wine cellar, a wet bar downstairs, an awesome kitchen with high-end appliances and a breakfast bar. The master bedroom had dinky closets but a bathroom almost the size of the bedroom itself. It might be hard to fit our furniture and clothes into this space -- granted I do need to get rid of some of my old stuff, so maybe it's not a terrible challenge. The biggest downside was that it back up to a major street (the front is on another street, but the back is on a street that has traffice 24/7). Can we live with the noise to be within blocks of Cherry Creek, the Cherry Creek Arts Festival, etc?
Who knew the American Dream was so picky? Or maybe that's just me...
Ever since I decided to sell my condo and live in sin by moving in with Iggy, I have wanted to sell his place. Maybe not the nicest start to things (hey, I love you, but we have to sell this dump and move). But it was a little bit of the traditional American love story, the American Dream (if you will) to buy a house *together*...
I was sorta reticent to broach the subject, so I've been slowly fixing up the current place. Sorta to make it part "mine" and part in preparation for showing it. I worry sometimes that we might make it too nice and we'll never get to get a new place together.
Somehow the new house bug hit Iggy hard about 2 weeks ago. He started searching Zillow.com and showing me houses on his iPAD during the evenings. Last weekend he came up with a plan to drive buy 6 or 8 of them and canvas the neighborhoods so we could get a feel for how much our money would get us. It was fun, but strangely exhausting. We covered several distinct areas of Denver and the suburbs (Capitol Hill, Cherry Creek, Lowry, Upper Lo-Do, and a couple I don't know the names of). I had to take a nap when we got home.
This weekend Iggy's real estate buddy drove us around to look at the insides of a few of the homes. Surprisingly some of the houses we looked at last weekend had already sold! I thought this was a tough seller's market. But maybe the economy is picking up after all...
At any rate, the inside of the first one (Lowry) was lovely, peaceful, contemporary...and maybe a little too "suburbia" for me. It felt a lot like every other house on the block This isn't bad. It's just part of the atmosphere.
The second house had strange levels (1 step up into the dining room, 1 step down into the kitchen, 1 step up into the family room, etc) and tile on the entire main level. It backed up to an apartment complex where people seemed to be working on their cars and milling about in the parking lot. And it smelled funny to me. We didn't even look at the upstairs or the basement.
The third house was built in 1899 and within blocks of downtown - walking distance to a couple restaurants we've tried and liked, a cool indie grocery/market/butcher shop, Daz Bog, etc. I could already feel my shift to hipster-wannabe starting. It wasn't much more room than we have now and the yard was mostly deck with a token amount of lawn/grass. The master bedroom had a lofted reading nook accessible only via a ladder. Can't decide if that's cool or I'd only use it under duress. It had an older kitchen, but some updates around the house. The current owners were clearly fans of IKEA based on the furnishings and the $3500 gift card offered at closing. The garage would take a 12-point turn for me to get my Subaru Outback station wagon into. (Definitely getting a smaller, hipper car if we move to this one.) The biggest worry was the staircase to the upstairs. Not sure Radar could make it...it's open and twisty (and cool) and wooden (read: slick for dogs whose back legs aren't so good anymore). Guess I'm not ready to be a hipster quite yet. (sigh)
The 4th house was just north of City Park and close to the city golf course. This means it's close to the zoo and the history museum. I pictured myself with a museum membership and walking over on afternoons to browse thorough the latest Paleontology or Egyptology exhibit. Very chic. Very intellectual. (And even healthy since I'm walking.) But it wasn't within walking distance of the museum. And the neighborhood felt like a ghost town, sterile, and vaguely creepy for being so well-kept and respectable on the outside but having no people present or outside on a Saturday afternoon. It was a pop-top but the added 2nd floor was done in the cheapest, most artificial way (loved the bathroom, but the vent looked like someone punched a hole in the wall and covered it with a grate to camouflage it). There was a strange closet in the kitchen where the microwave was housed. Like a mini-pantry, I guess. The downstairs ceiling was low enough that our 6'3" realtor's head touched the top at points. So much for my snooty intellectual dream.
The last house was in Cherry Creek. It turns out it was within walking distance of 3 coffee shops, a deli, and within 7 blocks you start hitting restaurants regularly listed in 5280 magazine. 7 blocks to the Cherry Creek Mall (and movie theater). The house was maybe 5% bigger than our current one (I was hoping for more space and better closets). But! It had several kick-ass features: a fire pit outside on the patio, a walk-in wine cellar, a wet bar downstairs, an awesome kitchen with high-end appliances and a breakfast bar. The master bedroom had dinky closets but a bathroom almost the size of the bedroom itself. It might be hard to fit our furniture and clothes into this space -- granted I do need to get rid of some of my old stuff, so maybe it's not a terrible challenge. The biggest downside was that it back up to a major street (the front is on another street, but the back is on a street that has traffice 24/7). Can we live with the noise to be within blocks of Cherry Creek, the Cherry Creek Arts Festival, etc?
Who knew the American Dream was so picky? Or maybe that's just me...
Saturday, January 7, 2012
Master Plan, Phase 2: On Hold
Somehow, I am not quite sure how, I arrived at the plan to adopt an older dog *AND* a puppy in 2012. Luckily Iggy seems agreeable to it all. He's never had 2 dogs at the same time. I've only had 2 dogs at the same time for a couple of years (prior to moving out of that house/relationship). So it is a little outside our comfort zone.
and the possibility of owning an intriguging Sharpei/Mastiff mix.
I am assuming that there will always be cute puppies to adopt, right?
I know I mentioned before that I had always wanted to adopt older dogs because I worry they won't get a second chance. But I don't view that as excluding me from adopting a puppy too.
But first to see if Phase 1 of the plan was going ok. We took Radar to the vet yesterday. I was worried about: 1: his weight (too skinny) 2: his back leg (hip displaysia? arthritis? too late to do anything?) 3: his hearing (either his name really isn't Radar, or he has "selective hearing" or he's deaf)
The vet was a funny little man. Very bookish. Prone to acting out his diagnosis (the loping imitation of hip displaysia was sorta funny). And he drew out a couple of diagrams about hip displaysia versus arthritis on a paper towel for me to take home. He told me that "adopting older dogs is like a mystery -- you see lots of clues but really have to guess at what the history is since you can't just ask them."
At that point we were talking about his hips and walking ability. Radar seemed not to care if the vet moved his back legs all around (the adoption vet said she was unable to extend his back right leg). The vet was speculating about whether the issue was genetic (hip displaysia) or arthritis (the vet thought perhaps Radar was hit by a car at some point -- does this really happen and the dog lives?). Radar's back legs both show muscle atrophy and especially on the right side. In fact, his right side is noticeably smaller than the left.
And his waist is too small. The vet seemed disappointed that Radar didn't have diarrhea. If he did (I guess) this might allow for the weight loss (5 pounds since he was originally dumped at the shelter). Without that as a reason, he was worried that there might be some cancer, specifically in the lungs which "sounded funny". The vet listened with 2 different stethoscopes, so he probably knows what he's talking about. But it could also be that when dogs are super skinny (like Radar) the heart rubs against the lungs and causes the grating sound he was hearing.
So first order of business is to fatten Radar up. Which is a good goal. It seems harder for me to lose weight myself or get my pet to lose weight. But I seem good at gaining weight (seeing all-new numbers on the scale these days -- eek!). The vet gave us a web site to use to figure out what to feed the dog to increase his weight gradually. (The annoying thing about that is that the web site is in kcals and the dog food bags seems to list in grams...I need to figure out some conversion somewhere. Of course even fattening up the dog the right way can't be easy.)
In a month or so, we will go back to the vet and weigh Radar. Then, if he's gained weight we'll see if we can get the vet to listen to his lung again. Then we'll decide if we need just x-rays on the hips or the hips and the lungs. I am trying to decide if knowing what the hip issue is will help us figure out how to treat it.
The vet also said it looked to him like Radar had some minor hearing loss. Radar's ears twitched to the vet's clanging of metal lids behind him, but he was really mostly interested in the treat I was holding. Inconclusive at best. It seems like as time goes on his hearing gets better. I think some of it is that he's learning what the relevant sounds are (the garage door means Iggy is home, the doorbell means someone new is about to come in, etc). And I think a lot of is that his name wasn't Radar...and now that he's learned to respond to that name we're stuck with it. (There was also a Hawkeye and a Trapper at the shelter...)
He probably does have selective hearing too. We all do, right? Choose to hear what we want to hear... ;-)
At any rate, today we decided to delay phase 2 of our master plan. On about an hourly basis I oscillated back and forth: get a puppy now because Radar seems to love other dogs and desperately wants to play on our walks? Or give Radar time to settle in and convince him that we're his family (he is so friendly that he'd go home with anyone!)?
The "give Radar some time" side won out. So we missed out on the super-grumpy-but-totally-cute Frank
and the possibility of owning an intriguging Sharpei/Mastiff mix.
I am assuming that there will always be cute puppies to adopt, right?
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
New Year, New Dog
We lost our dog last summer. It took a while to want to get a new one, but sometime time fall we decided to get one after we got home from our Christmas/New Year's trip.
We both knew we wanted to adopt from a rescue, the pound, the Dumb Friends League, etc. I think my husband wanted a puppy because you have the greatest chance to mold their personalities and the least chance of getting unusual issues. I have always wanted to adopt an older dog. I worry that they won't get the second chance. If I am truthful I want to adopt all dogs. I have a hard time choosing. In fact that was why in college I ended up with a grey and a black cat -- how do you choose just one?
The dog I had picked out from the web was an 11-yeat-old bulldog with "special needs." We saw her and she was really cute, but some of her special needs led to the conclusion that she would be best in a one-dog household. We haven't entirely ruled out getting a puppy. My second choice was another 11 year old, a beagle. She was cute and lovable to the handler we saw. However on our visit with her she wanted nothing more than to be on the other side of the door. The counselor said she was "independent" but to me it seemed we stressed her out. She would probably get over that eventually... The next dog we saw we took home. An 8-year-old yellow lab. He has a decided limp which I guess could be the precursor to arthritis or hip displasia. The vet there checked it out and said it was currently ok but to see if our vet wanted us to start him on something for joint pain...
We're in our settling in phase. I tried a walk with the dog...he tugs a bit, wants to greet every dog, every person we meet, and would like to hop in any car for a ride. So we don't have to worry about him being friendly. But he might try to go home with anyone with treats or a car! He had his first accident. We've had two or three dozen trips outside as we're trying to learn the signals for that. The only time I've heard him bark so far is on walks -- when he thinks other dogs should come over and play. He slept through the night the first night.
We both knew we wanted to adopt from a rescue, the pound, the Dumb Friends League, etc. I think my husband wanted a puppy because you have the greatest chance to mold their personalities and the least chance of getting unusual issues. I have always wanted to adopt an older dog. I worry that they won't get the second chance. If I am truthful I want to adopt all dogs. I have a hard time choosing. In fact that was why in college I ended up with a grey and a black cat -- how do you choose just one?
The dog I had picked out from the web was an 11-yeat-old bulldog with "special needs." We saw her and she was really cute, but some of her special needs led to the conclusion that she would be best in a one-dog household. We haven't entirely ruled out getting a puppy. My second choice was another 11 year old, a beagle. She was cute and lovable to the handler we saw. However on our visit with her she wanted nothing more than to be on the other side of the door. The counselor said she was "independent" but to me it seemed we stressed her out. She would probably get over that eventually... The next dog we saw we took home. An 8-year-old yellow lab. He has a decided limp which I guess could be the precursor to arthritis or hip displasia. The vet there checked it out and said it was currently ok but to see if our vet wanted us to start him on something for joint pain...
We're in our settling in phase. I tried a walk with the dog...he tugs a bit, wants to greet every dog, every person we meet, and would like to hop in any car for a ride. So we don't have to worry about him being friendly. But he might try to go home with anyone with treats or a car! He had his first accident. We've had two or three dozen trips outside as we're trying to learn the signals for that. The only time I've heard him bark so far is on walks -- when he thinks other dogs should come over and play. He slept through the night the first night.
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